Friday, April 22, 2011

number 2 - ready & execute.

A few friends asked me whether I was ready for this second pregnancy or it was an “accident”. To be honest, this is a well planned pregnancy. Yes, we wanted to have a 2 years gap (by counting the years, hadzim was born on 2009 and this one will be out on 2011, but it actually will be 2 ½ years gap).
 While pregnant with hadzim, hubs & I were discussing how much gap we will plan to have the second one. And we both agreed to have 2 years gap. The reason – mahu hadzim ada kawan untuk membesar sama-sama. So tak de la boring sangat. Plus, I wanted to have 2 kids before I reach 30 (my goal when I reach 3 series!).

For a caesarian mom cum non-user of family planning, during our first year after giving birth, I was scared to death every time I waited for my period. The first year is a “critical year” for me. Kalau bukan sebab Caesar tak de la takut sangat, but because of the caesarian we have to be super extra careful. Takut hoiihhhh. Kalau bersalin normal, nak beranak tiap-tiap tahun pon tarak hal (but still kalau ada proper plan lagi bagus kan? So tak de la menangis kalau anak masih kecil lagi tetiba pregnant pulak. Tapi kalau dah teraccident, redha sajelah. Tak guna nak menangis. Kesian kat anak dalam perut tu, padahal salah sendiri ;)).


Yes we planned for a 2 years gap, but since I was a caesarian with the first one, thus I should put a maximum limit to get pregnant and still remain to have the 2 years gap. So we planned for a November / December 2011 baby. Alhamdulillah, Allah heard our pray. I feel glad because it was an easy way for me to conceive. A good friend of mine, who was bunting pelamin for her first one and she planned for number 2 after 3 years but until now she is not lucky yet (been trying for 3/4 months already). So who said it’s easy to conceive even though the first time was like too easy? Its Allah blessed. Allah knows better and have better plan for us.

Anyways, this second one will be a benchmark in our kids plan. This is the only and final chance for me to have normal delivery. If I were opt for caesarian (again), thus 3 kids is a full stop. We don’t have much choice . Its too sad because we plan to have more than 3 kids but … Allah knows better (what more can I say ..?).

Number 3? It should be a longggg gap one. 

I just hope we will stick to the gap & plan because I don’t plan to use any family planning at all after this (degil! And we think we can survive without family planning accessories).

So, are you ready for the second one? Don’t simply get pregnant because your friends have theirs, but do have a proper planning so we don’t get upset when we suddenly saw the double line. Kesian baby yang dikandung, sebab ibu menangis sedih kerana terrrrpaksa mengandungkan dia. Air mata yg keluar bukan air mata kegembiraan tapi air mata kesedihan.

Tapi kalau dah accident … terima sajalah dengan hati yang redha =)

Thursday, April 07, 2011

ini bukan competition, sebab tak dapat hadiah pon ...

kenapa mesti ada orang yang menganggap perkara-perkara begini adalah competition ...?

1. siapa kawen dulu dia menang.
dulu, sebelum aku kawen, ada kawan lelaki (kawan rapat) sms aku.
w: farah, si m (kawan lelaki juga) nak kawen bln 12 ni.. haha dia kawen dulu sebelum kau .. haha kau kalah ..."
aku: yeke? dia nak kawen dulu biarlah dia kawen. jalan laa dulu, tak de hal lah. menang pon dapat hadiah apa ..? come on la. aku mmg dah plan nak kawen bln 7 thn dpn.. so tak de hal utk aku.."
aku tak faham kenapa ada orang yang berfikiran kolot macam tu. nak kawen dulu, kawenlah!! aku tak de hal laa.. sbb aku mmg nak kawen tahun depan. get it?!
kenapa mesti jadikan pertandingan - sape kawen dulu, dia menang?
kalau dah jodoh sampai, ada la, mungkin orang lain pon ada jodoh jugak, cuma antara cepat dan lambat sahaja. jangan hina orang yang lambat bertemu jodoh. bukankah lebih baik untuk mendoakan dia supaya bertemu jodoh dan bahagia seperti kamu juga?


2. siapa pregnant dulu dia menang. 
rezeki pregnant tu kat tangan kau ke? tuhan saje nak uji kau, lagi pulak kalau bunting pelamin. mesti kau rasa sangat hebat kan ..? pernahkah kau rasa bersyukur, betapa ramai yang teringin menjadi seperti kau - lps kawen terus pregnant..? haih. perlukah competition untuk hal-hal takdir Tuhan ..?


3. sape dapat anak no 2 dulu dia menang.
dulu, masa aku tengah pregnantkan hadzim, ada kawan bgtau:
a: tak sangka kau kawen dulu sebelum aku. lepas tu pregnant dulu sebelum aku. tak pe nanti aku potong kau untuk nombor 2 ...
aku: haaa ye laa kau pregnant laa nombor 2 cepat-cepat cebelum aku nanti .. (malas nak layan).
haih. tu pon nak jadikan competition. lantak kau la nak pregnant dulu ke hapa. aku ada plan sendiri untuk yang no 2, no 3 dan seterusnya (harap-harap plan menjadi tanpa eksiden & mendapat izin Allah). kalau rasa nak jalan dulu, silakan. aku & suami ada perancangan kami sendiri.


4. aku mesti breastfeed lagi lama daripada si dia. barulah aku menang.
aku dapat rasakan ada seorang dua yang berhati busuk yang berfikiran ataupon berniat macam ni. kenapa tak bole tanam dalam hati "isk, bagusnye dia dapat breastfeed anak dia lama macam tu. aku mesti jadi macam dia, demi anak aku .." bukan sebaliknya. haih.


semua rambut sama hitam, tapi hati lain-lain.
haih.